Torn

Dear Torn:
Never let maintaining high standards embarrass you. You can be proud of the fact your parents are instilling high morals in you that will affect you the rest of your life. Yes, it’s awkward to have to turn down invitations with friends, but look at it this way: By staying away from questionable entertainment, you’re protecting your mind and your heart. What a great investment!

When your friends invite you to something you won’t attend, consider suggesting an alternative. Paintball, laser tag, DVDs at your house, etc.

Dear Susie:
When I walk down the street I see homeless people holding signs that say, “Will work for food.” My heart wants to show people overseas the love of Jesus, because they’re really poor, many don’t have a family and work isn’t available for them.

But the people here are poor because they got involved with drugs. There’s no reason for people to beg for food or money in North America, because they can march into almost any store and apply for a job.

Stubborn

Dear Stubborn:
You may be partly right, but you’re not completely right. Yes, some people holding those signs are doing it as a scam or out of laziness, but others are truly desperate and need our help. Just because you personally may not see much poverty in North America doesn’t mean it’s not here. And not everyone who’s homeless came from a drug-related background.

I encourage you to ask God to give you a burden for all people who don’t know Christ—regardless of whether they’re homeless or living in wealth. Consider talking with your pastor or youth leader about working with a local food shelter or restaurant for coupons that your church can purchase. Keep a handful in your glove box, and when you see someone in need, hand him a food coupon. This will ensure he gets nourishment and not alcohol.

Dear Susie:
I wear comfortable but geeky clothes. I absolutely refuse to wear makeup, and I’m probably the only one in half of my classes who actually cares about what we’re learning. For those reasons, I have only a few friends, and it’s hard for me to find partners for group work.

I always feel as though I’m being excluded and that I don’t matter. Recently I’ve been slipping in and out of a minor depression, and I have no idea what to do. I wish I could tell someone what’s going on, but I can’t. I just want to feel as though I matter, and someone cares about me.

Invisible

Dear Invisible:
You’re not invisible! And you matter a great deal! Instead of taking your cues from how others act toward you, why not take your cues from the One who matters most? God says you’re so special that He calls you by your name! He declares that He has chosen you. (See Isaiah 43.)

He’s crazy about you! In fact, He smiles from ear to ear whenever you come to His mind . . . which is all the time . . . as in 24/7 . . . as in the fact that He’s never NOT thinking about you! (See Psalm 139.)

I understand your desire to belong; that’s normal. God created us as relational beings. You’ve stated that you wear “geeky clothes.” Though no one should judge someone’s outer appearance, it may be easier to make more friends if you put some time and thought into what you wear. Does that mean wearing “geeky clothes” is wrong? Absolutely not. But people are drawn to those who feel good about themselves, and maybe you’d feel better about yourself if you cared more about how you look.

You say you’ve been battling minor depression but don’t know whom to talk to. I’m guessing that you’ve been to a doctor, or you wouldn’t have that diagnosis. If you can’t talk with your parents, talk with your family doctor. And most important, talk to God. Every single day. About everything! He really does understand!